Wednesday, August 28, 2013

First day of school...

So, Kourtney entered the realm of public education today. I've been waiting for this day for some time now. Wondering how it was going to be, fantasizing about some time alone with Kloey (because we've never gotten much of that) and imagining how excited yet sad I would be for her.

Before I go any further, let me just show you a picture (the only picture I could get of her) of her first day of school. Be prepared... if looks could kill...


Really?!! Really?!! Let me just start by saying that after she found out that she wasn't going to be playing with toys all day (I've been telling her this all summer, yet it was apparently brand new information) she proceeded to act like I've never taught her a thing in her life. Oy! So we're sitting in the foyer of the school with other kindergarteners and their parents just waiting for the teachers to come and retrieve our children.

And she starts talking to me. I can't understand what she's saying because her fingers are shoved so far into her mouth that I'm afraid she's going to start gagging at any minute. And, to top it all off, she's talking in a baby voice. Now I know I know... she's scared, she's anxious, she's this, she's that. I know my kid. I know that she's shy. I also know that she knows how to play adults like a fiddle (although she doesn't play the fiddle, perhaps she'd excel at it?). Seriously, if she doesn't want to be somewhere or do something she pulls all the stops to get what she wants. We meet with a behavioral therapist regularly and he informs us of these types of things. I probably didn't handle things perfectly...

So I told her (jumping back to the story here) that she needed to talk like a big girl and get her fingers out of her mouth. She refused so I attempted to pull her fingers out so that I could more fully understand her. And she started hitting me. That's right, hitting me. She doesn't hit me. She knows better. She never gets away with that.

I had to push her away from me to get her to stop. Oh the looks I was receiving from the other parents! Looks of "*gasp* she physically assaulted her child" and "oh no! should we intervene?" and "that poor poor little girl, how could you?". And really folks? She was hitting me. So now I'm monumentally embarrassed. Fantastic.

Then the teachers emerge and ask the children to line up according to their teachers. So I grab Kourtney's hand and she jumps to the wall and starts whimpering. Will it never end? So I lean down really close to her ear and whisper as menacingly sweet as I can (I had lost all patience), "if you don't come over and stand in that line right now I will take every Merida toy that you got for your birthday and throw them all away". Well, she stood in the line.

And the teachers proceeded to start talking about some forms that we needed to fill out while we were there and we could follow our kindergartener to the classroom and what not. My child has her arms wrapped tightly around my leg and I knew if I bent down to hug her or anything it would have made it that much harder for her. I'm not heartless folks. I desperately wanted to hug her and hold her and kiss her and coddle her. But that would have done her zero justice.

I did stroke her hair a little and tell her that everything was fine. I then had to look at the teacher and inform her that it would be best if I just left right then and there. She nodded knowingly and I kissed Kourtney's head and walked out, exponentially disappointed and embarrassed about how this day went so differently than I planned or imagined.  *sigh* *sigh* *sigh*

I did catch a glimpse of her class walking to their classroom and Kourtney holding the teacher's hand. Oh, I just pray that this year she'll learn how to be more social. She was in preschool and never played with the other kids. She never plays with other kids in the park. And she just doesn't interact with kids. I worry for her. But I know that this is good for her. I wanted to coddle her. But I knew that if I did she would have fought even harder to not stand in line and not go to class.

And if I'm being honest, I was sad. True, it's just kindergarten. But no longer is she in my presence and under almost solely my example throughout the day. She has just entered the world of peers. For that is a scary thing. It is a great thing for so many reasons. And a scary one for just as many. I just pray that I've taught her well, despite what others may have thought of that cold, heartless witch of a mother dropping off her poor beaten down daughter at kindergarten. Shove it folks. I'm a good mom. And I know it.

Wednesday, August 21, 2013

Lazy or WHAT

Wow! I have taken way too much time off from my blogging. Life just gets so busy with the ups and downs and turn arounds, the heres and theres and everywheres. I get dizzy just thinking about it. My semester ended, we went on a 3 week vacation to visit my family (and let's face it, after 3 weeks of vacation with small children, driving across the country, and staying in your parents' house for so long, you need another vacation), then we get home and it's doctor's appointments, vaccinations, school registration and unpacking. And when I say unpacking I mean U-N-P-A-C-K-I-N-G!!!!!!! Here's what I mean....


Yeah. We had their birthday parties while we were home visiting. Can you say SPOILED?!!! But I was happy to see all of the love for my children. Not in material ways but in caring and loving ways. Of course they were thrilled for the material ways but never mind. *wink*

On the way out to Illinois (from Idaho, in a car, because we're crazy) we stopped at two hotels and really took our time. On the way home we were like, "forget this headache, we're driving straight through"... both ways produced headaches that lasted several days but both were also exciting and adventurous. I only wanted to throw my children out the window 5 or less times. We're counting it as a success.

So, we stopped at Ripley's Believe It Or Not in Jackson Hole, Wyoming (most beautiful place EVER)... Kourtney was not thrilled with it and quite terrified in fact. Jordan was in heaven and I must say I was rather intrigued.



We stopped at Carhenge in Alliance, Nebraska the next day. Americans... freakin' wacky.


Our third day on the insanely long roadtrip found us at Arbor Day Farms in Nebraska City. The kids loved this place and so did we. Oh my goodness, everyone should go... if you're into loving the earth and having fun, and just plain being awesome... if not, then it's not your thing. *cheesy grin*



Good times. We really had a blast visiting family as well. My sister in law Annie took awesome underwater pics of me and my siblings at Fun City in Burlington, Iowa (I think that's where it was). And they were incredible. But they're on her phone and I do not possess them (boo hoo). But when I do I will put those up.

This man spent his 28th birthday with me playing laser tag, speeding in go karts, roller skating and shopping. Perfection all wrapped up in a day! 

All in all this summer has been grand and crazy and hectic and fun and stressful and all of the above. I am just about ready for big over-sized sweaters, leggings, and boots... meaning Fall people... Fall (obviously). 'Til next time!