Epic

Hey all!!! Today I want to try another video. The other ones don't seem to be working. So here goes! Let me know if it doesn't work and if it does then you can still let me know.

This video contains epic cute-ness! Viewers beware. You will most definitely giggle. Perhaps even produce a hearty chuckle. A toddler trying to catch a laser... Kourtney did this as a toddler too! lol

Happy Down Syndrome Awareness Month!!!!

Great Adventures

Welcome to Holland
by Emily Perl Kingsley
Print Version

I am often asked to describe the experience of raising a child with a disability – to try to help people who have not shared that unique experience to understand it, to imagine how it would feel. It’s like this…

When you’re going to have a baby, it’s like planning a fabulous vacation trip – to Italy. You buy a bunch of guide books and make your wonderful plans. The coliseum. The Michelangelo David. The gondolas in Venice. You may learn some handy phrases in Italian. It’s all very exciting.

After months of eager anticipation, the day finally arrives. You pack your bags and off you go. Several hours later, the plane lands. The stewardess comes in and says, “Welcome To Holland”.

“Holland?!?” you say, “What do you mean “Holland”??? I signed up for Italy! I’m supposed to be in Italy. All my life I’ve dreamed of going to Italy”

But there’s been a change in the flight plan. They’ve landed in Holland and there you must stay.

The important thing is that they haven’t taken you to a horrible, disgusting, filthy place, full of pestilence, famine and disease. It’s just a different place.

So you must go and buy new guide books. And you must learn a whole new language. And you will meet a whole new group of people you would never have met.

It’s just a different place. It’s slower-paced than Italy, less flashy than Italy. But after you’ve been there for a while and you catch your breath, you look around…and you begin to notice that Holland has windmills…Holland has tulips. Holland even has Rembrandts.

But everyone you know is busy coming and going from Italy…and they’re all bragging about what a wonderful time they had there. And for the rest of your life, you will say “Yes that’s where I was supposed to go. That’s what I had planned”.

And the pain of that will never, ever, ever, ever go away…because the loss of that dream is a very significant loss.

But…if you spend your life mourning the fact that you didn’t get to Italy, you may never be free to enjoy the very special, the very lovely things…about Holland.

© 1987, by Emily Perl Kingsley. All rights reserved.
Reprinted with permission of the author.

I love this because there is just so much truth in it and it is so wonderfully said. Raising a child with Down Syndrome is going to be a lot like raising another “typical” child. But let’s be honest, it’s not what you’re expecting. You were expecting something else, someone else, a different “trip” if you will. But now this trip is changing drastically. Now you have to learn how to slow down, breathe deeply, and observe the beauty that is surrounding you.

Would it be another way

My dear friend asked me to write about whether or not I would be so involved in Kloey's milestones had she come first instead of Kourtney. And the answer is... I'm not quite sure. I believe that I would have been eventually but maybe not from the very start of her life.

To be sure, I definitely would not have had anything to compare it to so most likely I would not have been so good about keeping up with her therapies. I probably might have thought that there was no reason for the therapies and been less active in them. 

But I will say this, I got to see Kourtney develop and grow so quickly and because of that I knew what to expect. But it also went too quickly. With Kloey I get to slow down and appreciate my baby girl for so much longer than most people get to enjoy their babies. I like that I have my experiences with Kourtney to refer to when I need to know just how great Kloey's doing or to see what we should really be focusing on in her therapies. 

To sum up, I wouldn't want to switch them around. I learned first from Kourtney and because of that I don't feel the need to pressure Kloey to do the same things that I've seen Kourtney do. Because I know now that everything and everyone works in their own time... not our's. And I love that I can embrace that. 

My Klo

This was our final day of Down Syndrome Awareness month last year. I wanted to share it because I love the poem and the feeling in it. I'm also the world's crankiest person tonight and didn't want that to spill over in a blog post tonight. Much love!!!

The Final day of Down Syndrome Awareness Month...

To Kloey Alice:

I knew that you were there
yet, it did not feel quite real.
You grew and grew each day
but I did not know your soul.
Movements came all day and night
the connection was not there.
A thought of something extra
filled my heart with fear.

Each day I struggled endlessly
to know the girl inside.
I tried and tried
to no avail
to calm my racing thoughts.

One night you came.
I knew right then
you would not be the same.
As you struggled for your breath
I struggled with my pain.

You came into my arms
I looked into your eyes.
I was calm.
A smile formed.
But did not last for long.
I knew again
with certainty
you were what I feared.

A day passed by
without much thought
without much feeling
without much love.
I felt the need to run that day.
I felt the need to cry.
I felt that everything was lost.
I felt that life was done.

Then I saw you helplessly
laying on your own.
I grabbed your hand
and said your name
and cried for all your pain.

I fell in love that morning.
I fell in love with you.
I fell so deeply that despair
could never overcome.

I fall in love each day
with everything you are.
You teach so much of love
of being who
and what
you are.

Today I cannot possibly
imagine what I felt.
That day that was so numb for me
was fear and nothing else.

I do not fear you little one.
You do not have to worry.
I know that you have come to me
so that we can share this journey.

Thank you for joining us this month. I love you all!!!

two days

Of the two years that Kloey has been in our lives I have had two days with her that have been unbearable. Today was one of those days. I'm pretty sure she learned how to say no tonight. Great...

I mean, it's not like she's ever not adorable but today she was a bit of pill if I'm being honest. I'm nothing if not honest. This picture is actually from yesterday but this is what she was doing alllll day long. It was a bit exhausting. She'd cry for me to hold her. Then she'd cry for me to put her down. Then she'd cry for me to pick her back up. etc. etc. 

Sounds like any typical kid right? Right. She is learning all of these little games and how to get exactly what she wants. She'll be just as disappointed as Kourtney was to find out that we don't ever let them win those games. It's a sad day when they learn that. But they just keep trying anyway. 

She topped the night off with puking on my shoulder right after throwing a monster tantrum while I was putting her in the bathtub. I still can't decide whether she's sick or whether she just made herself super super upset to the point of throwing up. She was crying that hard. She was just sooo mad that I was trying to lay her down for bed. Goodness.

I have been lucky to have only had two of these days with her. I am counting my blessings because I sure can't say that I've only had two days like this with my first daughter!

Smiles

Can you believe that after this there are only ten more blog entries to go for Down Syndrome awareness month?!! Things have certainly been crazy 'round here but I have really been enjoying this.

The last couple of days I have been spending at home for the most part. Which means that I have much more time than usual to take tons of pictures of my sweet children. And Kloey learned something today....

SHE LEARNED HOW TO SMILE FOR THE CAMERA!!!!!

The closing of the eyes and everything. This is how she smiles for the camera. I was so happy!!! Every little thing is just so huge for us now. It truly is amazing how you start to celebrate every little accomplishment. And not just with Kloey, but with all of us! I love the love!!!


Time for picture overload!
We had family night in the girls' room tonight because honestly.... why wouldn't you? (wink)

Much love from the Hansen's

They are sisters meant to be

THEY ARE SISTERS MEANT TO BE

BY: STEPHANIE HANSEN

Into this family I came

without a warning to be sure.

My life would be much different 

than the one that came before.

A rocky start would test and prove

the love that would soon grow.

This journey now beginning

more complex than what you know.

A sister I was blessed with,

A sister I am to be.

Please let me show you about joy,

about friendship and charity.

For you I will do many things,

for you my heart is full.

I love you with a love so strong

nothing could make it null.

Never underestimate who I am inside.

As we grow together

our friendship cannot hide. --

A sister I am blessed with.

A sister I am to be.

I've seen just who you are

not how you might look differently.

I loved you with a love so strong

right from that first day.

I never wanted anything

but for you to stay.

We are sisters meant to be,

we are sent here to be one.

As sisters we will laugh and play,

as friends we shall be known.

And someday it will happen

that day will come too soon.

When you will feel the difference

that so many see in you.

I will learn that day, my dear

of what this journey is.

Our bond will not be severed.

This I lovingly promise.

Much love all!